Prayers for my Friend and his Family Please!!

So last night when I got home from work my friend got online and was talking to me. The Ironic thing about that is he is on his mission. The first thing that he said was
"Steph did you hear?" I said "No, what's up?"
"My dad was killed yesterday!" I immediately remembered what I felt the exact moment they called and told me that my Brother had died! I can't explain the feeling of emptiness that you suddenly feel, anger, frustration, hurt, sadness, regret, confusion.. every feeling and sentiment in the world hits you like a ton of bricks.. That is the only way that I can explain it. How do you get over the pain he asks? I don't, I haven't, I can't... I just live with it. How soon do you learn to live with it? As soon as you can come to terms with yourself, as soon as you can tell yourself everything's going to be fine, and I need to pull through and be proud of who he was.. honor him in everything that I do. I still break down in the shower.. I still hurt sometimes when I hear songs.. I still feel anger when I see his friends living life normally, but there are just somethings that you can't do anything about. I wrote many unanswered letters to church leaders, and asked many church members what is was to die. I know the plan of salvation, and I know what happens and for a really long time, I was upset at the church and it's members for the answers I was given, or the lack of attention I was receiving when I needed it the most. The only thing I can say is that it made me a better person today. I think it needed to happen in order for me to be ok with myself. Salo your dad will see justice. God will never let his death be in vain. I know that right now it may seem like life doesn't matter and it hurts to much, but the pain does weaken and you do become stronger.
So what I ask is for all my blog readers to please pray for the Jaar family that they may feel comfort and hope in this moment. Help them know that they will see their loved one again, and that they will miss him their remainder on earth, but that's the way it's suppose to be. Help them to not be sadden by his loss, but to be grateful for the time spent with him... and the opportunity he gave you for life, and all the love that he gave you.

Random

So I made these block like 3 months ago and I never took a picture of them to show everyone what they look like!

It Says Cherish! I have no idea where to put them though so they are chillin in front of my T.V.

Close up. The stupid scrapbook paper bubbled on a couple block but they still look way cute!

And the end of cherish.

So pretty much still not a lot going on. I need a new job. I hate mine.. so if anyone knows of anything really good that is hiring let me know please!

So today

Im sitting here being not a very good mother but it was only for a second. I was reading a friends blog and lily wants up on the couch! When I look down on the floor there is her diaper! WHAT A GIRL! Gosh Hope she doesn't pee on the couch!