Monday, October 19, 2009

Lilianes Condition.


So 3 to almost 4 weeks ago Liliane and the whole family got the flu. Except her diarrhea never went away. I had been taking her to a Dr. every week telling them that she still has diarrhea and they said it was normal, or it was because she was getting all four top teeth at once! Ok I know how hard it is for them to get teeth, but diarrhea doesn't last for more then a couple days I mean I'm not stupid I took care of my little cousins and what not. I just don't like the Bull con answers that they are giving me. But I keep trying to fix her myself.. like before, with just straight pedialyte or just banana juice or rice in everything.. it's not working. What liquid goes in comes straight out her bum; within seconds too! It's just really disheartening. So finally I took her to the InstaCare and he ordered a bunch of tests, and he's just like you need a stool sample whenever you can get one just hang out for a few days.. well unfortunately we couldn't wait a few days. Yesterday after her breakfast of bananas bread and a little bit of baby food she did the grunting and you could here that she had just went poop. Well When I changed her diaper it was full of blood! Just straight blood. I didn't know how to react to this.. and of course lily is screaming bloody murder not helping the situation at all! So of course I started crying, not knowing what else to do.. I put the diaper in a bag and we get ready and go to the ER.. let me tell you if you really have an emergency never go to UVRMC we waited 2 and a half hours and we weren't getting seen. Well I picked up told them to shove it and we went to Orem community! Of course no one was there and we got seen right away.
The thing that upsets me the most is that the Drs approach to me is very rude like, " we can't figure out what's wrong with her since you couldn't get that stool sample." That is not what I want to hear. I want to hear that you are going to help me get that sample and that you are going to figure out what we are doing to help this BABY, cause after all that is what she is a baby! So finally they do some blood work and I was about to die!! They put in a butterfly needle in her arm.. to us that's like nothing, but to babies that's like a 12 gage needle when you're giving birth! HUGE! So they blood work comes out ok. Now we get sent home she finally goes in the bag that they placed, and then we go to the hospital again to drop it off! Now we wait. The Dr said she might have to go to a Pediatric Endocrinologist which is the digestive system Dr, and they will do a Pediatric colonoscopy. Whatever needs to be done to find out why she is having malabsorbtion. As a parent you think of your child as perfect. So when she is so brittle like this and you can't help her it tears you down, and I am super depressed for her and for myself because I feel like I am failing my daughter. I stay up with her at night when she is screaming because you can just hear her stomach hurting and it hurts me more then it does her, because I want more then anything to just take on her pain.
That is something Drs. wont understand. To me, I'm desperate for answers.. to them, I'm just an overprotective parent. So everyone please keep lily in your prayers because she's getting worse everyday.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Coping!


So nothing really new is going on here!
Well Actually Lily is a walking!! Yup and she's not even 11 months yet! She's still pretty sick with that bug! Hopefully that gets better! She talks a lot more, it's all jibberish but I pretend like it's really a conversation and she seems to like that a lot!

So I've just been having a hard time coping with not having the same friends that I used to! Not being able to text them and joke about something that was said or that reminds me of that person.. it's hard, but they're not around; so I can't put myself in the situation where they are going to hurt me or my family again. Life just quite hasn't been going as I planned! I got this job at night so I could help rob out so he wouldn't have to quit working, but he didn't appreciate that at all he was almost mad. I think it's dumb that I'm always thinking about people and they don't even give me that same consideration. Whatever though! I'm just having a hard time dealing with the reality of it all I guess. Like I really didn't expect for anyone to grow apart. :( But I guess its something that has to happen.

Anyways something crazy happened and I took a video of it. We went to the duck pond by our house and you'll see!